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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27896260">Letters To You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ccyuuuuuu/pseuds/Ccyuuuuuu'>Ccyuuuuuu</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crushes, Cute, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Idols, Love at First Sight, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Sad, Sad and Sweet, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 17:07:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,070</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27896260</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ccyuuuuuu/pseuds/Ccyuuuuuu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dear Jisung, I'm dying. </p><p>.+</p><p>In which a cold beauty reminisce back her life with certain someone on a piece of paper.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Park Jisung (NCT)/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. S</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=My+dearest+M">My dearest M</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>19th November 2006,</p><p>I still remember the first time I met you in the kindergarten.A new kid arrived and I saw a baby chick.A baby chick, that lost its mom.</p><p>Crying so loud because you're alone in a kindergarten full of stranger.</p><p>At that time, a feeling emerged.It was an unknown feeling for me.I never felt that kind of feeling before.</p><p>Not when dad kissed me on the cheeks or when mom baked a cake for me.</p><p>I wanted to walk to you, to comfort you.Saying that you'll be fine.But my legs couldn't move.It was as if somebody was pulling my legs closer to the ground so I couldn't move.</p><p>And I only could watch the boys and the girls running to you to soothe you.Miraculously you smile.</p><p>Like the snow that was falling at that day, you melt my heart.</p><p>I treasure that day.</p><p>Because I met you.</p><p>But I always have regretted that day.</p><p>Because if only I took a step forward to you, maybe you could've notice me.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe. </em>
</p><p>But I only could watch you became friends with all of them except me.</p><p>
  <em>Except me. </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. I</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>I often ask myself why did I became a child actress in the first place?</p><p>At first I hate it so much.So much that I felt disgusted with my work.</p><p>Because I couldn't see you. </p><p>6th March 2008,</p><p>When I starred in the horror movie, I didn't expect it would blow up.</p><p>I heard the movie became the highest grossing movie in Korea at that time. </p><p>For that reason, I need to move out from my house.I need to leave everything.</p><p>I need to leave you. </p><p>I was not used to the massive popularity I had received.They said because of my expressionless face.</p><p>Like a cold beauty.</p><p>But what a mere 6 year old kid knew at that time? </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. N</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>During the time you were not with me, I watched many actors and actresses crumbled because of a simple mistake.</p><p>Then I realized...the industry is very harsh. </p><p>Harsher than the cold wind on the winter during my second year meeting you. </p><p>Once on the top of the top now they could only live quietly in their house. </p><p>I'm not scared if I became like them at that time. </p><p>'cause that means I'd be a normal person again.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. C</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>28th December 2008, </p><p>I won Best Young Actress for my drama Love, It's You.</p><p>After the horror movie, I started to act in the drama, playing a sick girl who has leukemia.</p><p>They said I won because my acting had touched many people's hearts.</p><p>But what's the point of touching everyone's heart when I couldn't touch yours?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>5 March 2009,</p><p>I don't believe in fate, they already separated us once.</p><p>But when I enrolled in a new school and I found the face I had been missing sitting in a corner of the classroom,</p><p>I started to believe in fate once again.</p><p>Because they brought me to you. <br/><br/><br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>P.s. Even now your face still looks like a newborn baby chick.</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. R</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
   Dear Jisung,</p><p>14 March 2011,</p><p>It was White Day. </p><p>Last night before, I stayed up all night.</p><p>Making white chocolate for you. </p><p>I thought that would be the time where I could be brave enough to talk to you. </p><p>But when I saw you at school, my mind went blank.</p><p>It's quite funny if I remember it again, </p><p>you were far away from me like 10 meters away.</p><p>Still, I couldn't think of anything.</p><p>The words I practiced all night, the image I dreamt of, </p><p>everything disappear the moment I saw you. </p><p>At the end I didn't give you the chocolate.</p><p>Because I thought that I'm more suited to watch you from far away. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
   Dear Jisung, </p><p>27 June 2011, </p><p>I heard Im Yunseong, the class president liked you.</p><p>My heart skipped a beat.</p><p>Lots of thought running through my head at that time. </p><p>Why must other person liked you? </p><p>Why?</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. L</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>6 March 2012,</p><p>I was happy when I got to know we're in the same class again.</p><p>But when I got there, you weren't there.</p><p>I looked and I looked but there wasn't any sign of you.</p><p>
  <em>Where are you?</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Y,</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>15 April 2012,</p><p>It's been weeks since the school started at that time.</p><p>I hadn't seen you at all.</p><p>I wasworried.</p><p>Park jisung...</p><p>
  <em>just where in the world did you go? </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>17 April 2012</p><p>You came today. </p><p>The dead butterflies in my stomach suddenly came alive when I see your face. </p><p>My heart beated so fast, so fast that I thought everyone in the class could hear the beating. </p><p>But you just look at the blackboard, ignoring me as usual. </p><p>That's okay. </p><p>Seeing you alive and healthy is all that matter to me at that time. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. T</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>2 May 2012</p><p>I realised that you are talking less and less. </p><p>When people are talking about the newest game, you don't talk at all. </p><p>It's like you don't know about the game. </p><p>I thought you love games?</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. H</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>23 August 2012,</p><p>There's a rumour going around in the school. </p><p>They said you've become a trainee. </p><p>Is it true? </p><p>Is that the reason why you keep going to school on and off? </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>26 August 2012</p><p>So it is true. </p><p>You have become a trainee. </p><p>An idol... you...</p><p>You are going to be the cutest idol the world has ever known. </p><p>So...</p><p>SM entertainment huh</p><p>The company must be lucky to have you. </p><p>They get to you before I can get to you. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>1 September 2012</p><p>I did a crazy thing that day. </p><p>I finally signed up in a company. </p><p>The media has been bugging me for a while at that time because I'm not in company. </p><p>So I did sign up. </p><p>In Sm Entertainment. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. O</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>I feel like I need to explain to you. </p><p>Don't get me wrong, they have called my family many times at that time. </p><p>They said they're looking for a genius like me. </p><p>They said I'm a rare talent. </p><p>But I hesitate. </p><p>Will it be a right choice? </p><p>So when I found out that you are a trainee under SM, </p><p>It feels like a destiny. </p><p>Maybe fate is playing with my heart.</p><p>My mind disagree but for the first time I follow the beating of my heart. </p><p>It is an opportunity. </p><p>A perfect opportunity for you to recognise me. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. N</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>14 November 2012,</p><p>I got new drama offer. </p><p>That time I'll be playing the female lead when she was younger. </p><p>The lineup for the drama consist of awards winners.</p><p>Naturally, the news said, everyone was eagerly waiting for the drama. </p><p>By everyone, I mean the whole Korea. </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
   Dear Jisung, </p><p>27 December 2013,</p><p>The drama finally finished airing. </p><p>It has became one of the highest rated drama in Korean cable television history. </p><p>It means lots of people watched the drama. </p><p>Did it mean you also watch the drama? </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>25 August 2016,</p><p>You debuted.</p><p>I've waited for a long time for that moment.</p><p>For three years, I acted in every dramas and movies offered to me.</p><p>Because that way, time would fly faster.</p><p>And it worked I must say. <br/><br/><br/><br/></p><p>
  <em>P.S: I got addicted to gum because of you. </em>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>P.P.S: your bowl hair cut looks cute &lt;3</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. W</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>30 December 2016,</p><p>Have I ever told you the story about when I won best newcomer award? </p><p>I was supposed to give a speech, and somehow, my mind flashed the image of you. </p><p>And I almost slip your name out of my mouth in front of all the actors and actresses. </p><p>But thankfully I didn't.</p><p>I didn't want to ruin your career. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. H</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>17 August 2017,</p><p>Blue looks so good on you.</p><p>I almost dye my hair blue that day, that moment.</p><p>But my manager held me back.</p><p>It's a pity... <br/><br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p><p>
  <em>But seriously should I? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I think it will look good on me </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. O</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>16 September 2017,</p><p>I finished shooting my new drama.</p><p>That time it's a family drama.</p><p>I became the youngest daughter of a rich family.</p><p>The shooting proceed easily without any trouble.</p><p>It was one of the easiest drama I've ever acted even though it has 100+ episodes.</p><p>Maybe because <em>I am</em> the daughter of a rich conglomerate?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>10 October 2017,</p><p>I need to fly across the world. </p><p>The movie offer I got that time was from U.S.</p><p>It's an action movie.</p><p>But I can't recall the movie title. </p><p>Anyway, the movie has become the start of my career there. </p><p>I missed you all the time while I was there . </p><p>A lot. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. L</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>30 January 2018,</p><p>I saw the video. </p><p>What is it call again? </p><p>Anyway I really can't comment on that video. </p><p>Nope.</p><p>Not that video. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. O</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>4 March 2018,</p><p>I came back to Korea. </p><p>It was exhausting shooting the movie. </p><p>That day, </p><p>You made a comeback.</p><p>Who knows after not seeing you for a few months, you can change so much. </p><p>Eyy, the cutie Jisung has become a rebellious teenager.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. V</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>10 March 2018,</p><p>My manager said because I have worked so hard, he bought me a ticket to your showcase. </p><p>I'm so excited at that day!</p><p>It was my first time meeting you in real life after so many years. </p><p>I was in denial on whether to wear the a dress or jeans. </p><p>I wanted to look good at least once in your eyes. </p><p>But no matter what I wore at that time, you would never notice me.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>14 March 2018,</p><p>I'm sorry. </p><p>I'm sorry.</p><p>I couldn't go. </p><p>I really wanted to. </p><p>I don't remember how I fainted.</p><p>When I opened my eyes, I was already at hospital.</p><p>There's still time for me to go there but my manager won't let me go. </p><p>I think fate really hates me. </p><p>I really want to see you.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. S</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>I'm dying. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>It's cancer. </p><p>I don't know how but it's cancer. </p><p>Just when I thought I get to see you. </p><p>Just when I thought it will all be better. </p><p>Reality comes crushing me hard. </p><p>It hits me with the fact that happy ending is not meant for me. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Y</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> <br/> Dear Jisung, </p><p>Many dramas and movies offers come to me. </p><p>But how can I accept it? </p><p>I could die in the middle of shooting process. </p><p>They will need to find someone else to replace me if I die. </p><p>It would be a hassle to them. </p><p>Do you know that the news of my cancer hasn't been spread yet? </p><p>I think I am kinda good at closing my private matter. </p><p>I mean they still bash me on social media. </p><p>Clearly they don't know I am sick because if they do, they won't be saying things like that to a nearly dead person. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. O</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung,</p><p>My parents has been informed of my sickness. </p><p>It's kinda amazing that I can hide the news from them for this long. </p><p>However, they dragged me back to their house. </p><p>They want me to go to the hospital. </p><p>But I refuse. </p><p>I really don't want to. </p><p>So I just lay in my bed, writing these letters to you. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. U</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>And that is the end</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Of her pov ;)</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>   Dear Jisung, </p><p>My body is getting weaker. </p><p>I can't write properly anymore. </p><p>Maybe this is the last letter I will write to you. </p><p>jisung-ah, I always watch your videos. </p><p>Your smile makes my day.</p><p>It brightens up my day when there were dark clouds everywhere. </p><p>Your laughs are music to my ears. </p><p>My heart always beats so fast everytime I heard your laugh. </p><p>Jisung-ah,</p><p>It has been years since last saw you. </p><p>I wish to meet you one more time. </p><p>Just one more time. </p><p>But I know it will not happen.</p><p>Because fate always taking me far and far away from you. </p><p>I know you don't know me. </p><p>I know we have never talk before. </p><p>I know you never see my face before.</p><p>I know you never know I exist. </p><p>But you're everything to me. </p><p>You have filled my mundane days. </p><p>You give me hope to keep going. </p><p>You has become one of my reasons to live. </p><p>You, </p><p>are my strength. </p><p>I can only write this letters to you. </p><p>Letters that contains nothing but the truth. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>Dear Park Ji Sung, </p><p>I love you. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
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